“My Goddess and I”
By: Ahnabahn Morph'Oht'Spwiigohl Tay'Kay'Yah1
(AKA Tristan A. Arts)
Alone one day in contemplation,
The doorbell rang for me.
I answered it with small frustration,
For I'd not been expecting company.
A stranger stood outside my door,
A Bible in his hands.
He asked if I'd met his god before,
For conversion was his plan.
So, polite, I let him in,
And made the man some tea.
He spoke a lot of God and sin,
And I got a brochure for free.
After he had spoken for a while,
I sipped my tea and said,
“It sounds like the right path for you,
But might kill my own soul dead.
“For this god of yours sounds so aloof,
With communication just one way.
As to myself, I need some proof
That my Deity hears the things I say.
“My Goddess answers inside my mind,
In words as clear as a sunny day.
Just the slightest poke inside my mind,
And there She is, soon as I pray.
“She's been through so much with me,
Her love unconditional and stable.
She's held me, loved me, believed in me,
Even when I found myself unable.
“My Goddess has not judged me ever,
Nor has She punished or berated.
She's firm but gentle, and quite clever,
Her love for me is unabated.2
“And when I hated myself so very much
That I tried to fall to my demise,
My Goddess stopped me with a touch,
Tears of sorrow in Her eyes.
“Even the years when I felt dead inside,
From fear, depression, and stress,
And my spirituality seemed to have died,
She still loved me, and tried Her best.
“I rarely felt anything, rarely spoke with Her,
But when I did, She was always there.
With wisdom and love, a comfort for sure,
More reliable, even, than water or air.
“She comforts me and soothes my fears,
She strengthens me and helps me learn.
And my Goddess, through all these years,
Has never asked for anything in return.
“Plus, She's not burdened by a holy book
Self-contradictory and obsolete.
Her wisdom is immediate as a look,
And as relevant to today as can be.
“I would not be alive today without Her,
Nor coped with the world so well.
And though I don't believe in it, sir,
Her help would be worth going to Hell.
“I do not proselytize or preach my way,
Nor expect anyone to join me.
Since I know for a fact that when I pray,
My Goddess has practical, real help for me.
“My Goddess is precisely what I need,
Nothing more and nothing less.
I could no more follow your creed,
Than you could worship Bes.
“You talk of a personal God who cares,
But your prayers are too one-sided.
And I'd rather suffer Hell and stares
Than to have not been – by Her – guided.”
So it was the preacher sighed,
And picked up his black tome.
A nod of his head his only reply,
As he quietly left my home.
~ ~ ~ END ~ ~ ~
1 = One of my spiritual names. Means "Reverend Beautiful Pyre."
2 = I found this line so powerful, I considered naming the poem "Unabated."
One last note: Djao'Kain and Shao'Kehn are two names for the same Deity.
Crossposted from http://fayanora.dreamwidth.org