November 19th, 2013

Hermione not amused

Harry Potter movies

I recently saw the "Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix" movie again. Ye gods, I must have blocked that piece of shit from my memory. I remembered the third movie being a confusing piece of shit that made me want to drop a ton of books on Guillermo del Toro for bringing that abominable abortion into our world for. But the fifth movie... gods, it makes the third movie look like a masterpiece by comparison! I gave HP3 five stars on IMDB. I gave HP5 only two. I only gave it two because the lady who played Umbridge did a good job. If not for that, it would have gotten one. Hell, if I could give it negative stars, I would. I have seen better adaptations of "White Fang." (Something about that book inspires people to keep making shitty movie adaptations of it. Excellent book, possibly my favorite of all time, but there will never be a good movie adaptation of it.)

I think I'm going to block that movie out again. I mean, all the Harry Potter movies except the first two are horrible and make me want to drop a ton of books on the directors, but 3 and 5 are the worst. I think Rita Skeeter has an excellent quote that applies to the HP movies 3 and later: "And that's just the tip of the dung heap!"

We'll see how I feel about HP6. I don't remember anything about that one, either.

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