November 5th, 2008


A new word

Partrade [parr-trade] = n. A moving party, a festive celebration that moves along like a parade. v. To festively celebrate while moving along like a parade. Origin: combined party and parade.

Writer's Block: A Little Light

Now that the election is over, we can get to the important stuff. Why is there a light in the refrigerator but not in the freezer?

It is a little known fact that there are actually very tiny people that live in the refrigerator and freezer. The two species are like very tiny gnomes, usually no bigger than a pinky-finger's fingernail. Both species are nocturnal. The ones that live in the freezer look like tiny Inuit (AKA "Eskimoes"), and can tell the future 10 minutes ahead of time, giving them plenty of time to hide from the humans before the door is opened. The same is true of the ones that live in the fridge, but the fridge-dwellers don't mind the light coming on. The freezer dwellers, however, hate light. When fridges and freezers were first being made, there were attempts made to put a light in the freezer as well as the one in the fridge, but the freezer-dwelling gnomes were always and forever sabotaging the light. Unable to explain the problem and unable to fix it, engineers finally decided that the freezing temperatures of the freezer were damaging the bulbs and stopped trying to put lights in the freezer. And they all lived happily ever after. The end.

PS = The freezer-dwelling gnomes are called Teenuit ["teen-you-it", from "teeny" and "Inuit"], and the fridge-dwellers are called Scanadians [from "scant" and "Canadians"].